Reply to Your story of living together, guy finally committed

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Is commitment only defined by a marriage license?  DH and I have been together for 36 yrs.  We’ve lived together for 25.  We have 4 kids.  At different points in our relationship we’ve each wanted to get married but it’s never been important enough to either of us to do something about it.  We both know that if either one of us feels the need to get married that person needs to get the license and make the appt at the courthouse.  It’s not very romantic but we’ve long passed the big wedding stage.  [/quote]

Make sure you have legal aspects covered. If something happened to you him or kids, you do not have the same rights as a spouse. The law has provisions in so many areas for spouses. It’s not so much about the wedding but the contractual provision too.[/quote]

Aren’t they essentially common law spouses at this point?
[/quote]

Tell that to the ER doctor that needs next of kin to authorize life support because you are a common law spouse. Ever seen million dollar baby? Laws need to be enforceable to mean something.

There are a ton of laws. You know if someone goes down on you in the Commonwealth of Virginia, and you complain, they can be sentenced to life in prison?
https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/title18.2/chapter4/section18.2-67.1/[/quote]

That’s interesting because I know someone who went to the emergency room recently and wrote down that the woman he lives with is his wife. He was admitted to the ICU and only the girlfriend was allowed in to visit him for the extent of his stay.  His children were not allowed in to the ICU, only the girlfriend, whom he had listed as his wife. 
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Okay. You realize you’re proving my point. Laws need to be enforceable to matter. Writing down you’re a spouse at pickup doesn’t mean crap. People always assume my SO is my spouse. Doesn’t sound like a decision on whether to keep alive or die was being made. And, the legal distinction doesn’t hinge on that one point alone. If your common law spouse is disabled or dies early, you’re not getting their social security. No matter what happens or who my ex husband marries, I get his social security as 1st wife, then our child. There are a zillion things that change procedure when married, like withdrawing from an IRA without both parties notarized signature. It is a contractual protection.

Covid procedure likely restricted the visitors.[/quote]

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