Reply to Spouse Telling People in Our Circle We Are Separating

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Well I guess your spouse is convinced you are done or else is looking for sympathy. [/quote]

I think it's his way of making sure it happens.  By putting it out there, he is putting the wheels in motion.

Really crappy thing to do, ESPECIALLY if you have kids!!  They will hear about from others before you.[/quote]

Wondering this too.  I've seen this situation played out before and one spouse kept saying how they had NO idea other spouse was serious and that the rug had been pulled out from under them.  Except a few of us knew they had been discussing it for months and that person refused to believe the other spouse that the marriage was over. [/quote]

Mine didn’t believe I was serious until I handed him keys to a new place that I’d arranged for him. He might be trying to take control of the narrative if OP isn’t doing her part. [/quote]

the correct way to convey that you are serious about separating is to move out and/or have you lawyer draft the papers for the property and parenting plans. anything else is just passive-aggressive. it’s just as easy for the supposedly serious spouse to pretend and then blame it on the other one. hello, if you want to divorce you actually need to do it, not talk about it. the longer you talk about if without doing it, the less serious you’ll be taken. and if instead of doing anything you go around telling other people ... well, you’re just really lost and setting up a contentious split. [/quote]

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