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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
OP here.  No, I'm not actually.  I'm pretty assertive at work.  In this situation I feel like I can't say anything because if I do (and when I have hinted at it in the past) I will get pretty much the reaction I got from people on this board - You don't understand how hard it is until you have a kid, it's no big deal for you to drive an hour, my life is harder than yours, etc.

I guess I was hoping to hear that there was some line of argument that I could try that would be persuasive to parents and make them understand that I would like them to spend a little time in my life (seeing my house, neighborhood, favorite places, local park, all the things that make my world mine). I feel like they don't really know me (especially my sisters-in-law who have known me a shorter time) because they don't know me in the context of my life, only in the context of their own lives.

We may not end up having kids, so this is the live we have and it is important to us just the way it is. 
 [/quote]

Be frank with them.  I say this as a mother of 3 young kids who is hosting Thanksgiving again b/c it truly is easier to have it at my house than at my in-laws.  I really do have some sympathy for you, I really do.  I pretty much have never visited my sister in NYC (at her place) with my kids b/c it is SOOOO much easier for her and her husband to come down here (other immediate family lives here too).  And her tiny little apartment just wouldn't house us all so we'd have to get a hotel room (2 actually) and so on.

This really isn't fair to her.  But I truly don't think she is bothered by it.  She understands.  She has spent enough time with my kids to appreciate that they would last about 10 minutes in her apartment.  And she is okay with it.  But if she did have a problem, I'd want to know.  I'd want her to be straight up and I'd really try to respect that and make more effort.

HTH.[/quote]

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