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[quote=Anonymous]How old are your kids OP? I found the first year after giving birth I just needed more help on things. 9 months of pregnancy and then middle of the night wakes up (b/c I was the one nursing) times multiple kids in a row just really took it’s toll on my stamina. I felt like I was going into everything with weakened reserves and I really relied on DH to use some reserve energy to get through some of the bedtime battles. I’m not sure how old your kids are, but assuming fairly young, try to keep in mind what her body has been through while gestating, birthing, and nursing 3 children. She has taken on a lot that you just couldn’t because biology. Maybe this is your place to shine.

Also, I am a night owl so I tend to be more productive in the evenings. We split things a bit differently than you (I put toddler down at 7:30 and DH puts 6.5 y/o down at 8). I am then the one who most often cleans the kitchen up while he’s doing the older one’s bedtime, stays up a bit later to finish folding laundry and putting stuff away. DH is the morning person who unloads the dishwasher and gets breakfast ready while I sleep in an extra 30 min.

Not everything has to be tit for tat. I understand you need time to work (DH and I are always negotiating time to catch up on things now that we have kids at home). But I agree with PPs about dividing based on your strengths and not trying to split 50/50.

For instance, I don’t mind doing laundry whereas DH doesn’t mind doing lawn maintenance and handy type stuff around the house that I have no interest in figuring out how to do.[/quote]

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