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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Your husband is his own person. He needs to decide if he's going to spend money on a round trip cross country ticket to fly during a pandemic while taking a day off from work to go do something that someone local could do instead.

It's not your place.[/quote]

OP has every right to put her foot down on this. Too big an ask when it involves times, energy, and money. Resources that ought to be directed to OP and kids.[/quote]

hum ok, the brother of OP's husband is likely in  a life threatening situation and the SIL is asking the brother of her husband for help in getting him emergency medical attention. you say that OP is right in putting her foot down because her husband is spending resources that should be spent on OP and her kids? are you kidding? we are not talking about OP's husband going with the bros to Las Vegas or on fishing trip to Florida. this is a medical emergency his own brother is experiencing. the fact that the SIL does not want to ask for her family help may suggest they may have helped before and may be fed up of having their sister/SIL married to a raging alcoholic. I am not saying this is an easy thing and OP's husband should investigate if there is any way he can participate remotely or signing and mailing the affidavit or any other way to avoid the trip. otherwise it is up to him to go and I find OP's behavior truly awful. we had emergency in my family and the lifesaving thing was having a spouse who said do what you need to do and I will deal with it. I had a relative with terminal cancer who had a couple of emergencies and I flew (pre-pandemic) to Europe twice in six months on a day notice . my husband was aware of the high cost and the fact that he was going to be  entire responsible to take care of kids and I felt I had to go but that it was not right for my family. I am so grateful that my husband just hug me and told me to go if I wanted to and not to worry. recently his family had issues and he was concerned. I did the same thing for him, told him to go if he needed and stay longer if he wanted, and I would manage the house. he drove 16 hours each way to avoid flying. I find OP's behavior appalling, I can't even think of being in a situation in which my brother is in trouble and I can help and my husband would pout, I would never forgive him.  [/quote]

You're comparing apples to oranges.[/quote]

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