Reply to If there was a golden/favored child in your family, how did they turn out as adults?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Why is it that these 'Golden Children' are often people who don't do well in life as adults, e.g. dropping out of education, drink, drugs, debts, you name it? Why did their parents favor them?[/quote]

[b]I think the parents are overcompensating some of the time. They know all is not well and they think "Golden Child" just needs a little more love, compassion, empathy, etc at the expense of other children. But it doesn't make any difference in the outcome and alienates the non-favored children.[/b][/quote]

x10000

SIL is the Golden child, and not very independent.  DH gave her a job to get her on her feet while she had kids, and did a lot for the family so that SIL could be independent, but SIL has zero acknowledgement of that.  We sacrificed more than she knows for that to happen, sadly.

I have a sister that was mom's golden child, I was dad's golden child.  I think it is healthier to be the opposite gender's golden child, somehow.  Sister thinks she is above it all, and can do no wrong, and bears a huge burden from the expectations put on her.  Probably the same with SIL. DH and I had very few expectations put on us, and are happy adults.  The sister and SIL, not so much.  I wouldn't want to be them, frankly - their view of themselves is enormously distorted. [/quote]

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