Reply to Tips for kids who are "handfuls"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here- the milk thing is because she would drink 40oz of milk a day if allowed and not touch food. It's been an ongoing issues with her ped. We have finally been able to get it to a manageable amount if we are strict with the 3x a day rule. Then she knows milk is coming if she waits.

We really have very few rules. She can eat anywhere in the house, as long as she's not lying down. She picks out her clothes and doesn't have to change if she doesn't want to. We use Ellyn Satter method for food and don't comment on what she eats, ever. She gets to choose what she wants for breakfast and lunch and snack time, she's allowed snacks whenever.

Some kids are just...like this. It's not about my control issues. I will say, she is incredibly smart. She knows her abcs, numbers etc by sight, can count to 20, say 4 word sentences. Maybe she's bored?

I will check out the explosive child. I had bad anxiety as a kid, but that was more due to families circumstances, could this be anxiety? [/quote]

You say you do Ellen Satter but you describe the exact opposite of Ellen Satter.

DOR was really important for my intense kid.

I do think what you describe sounds like anxiety, and more structure in general might help.[/quote]

Haha love it. So my rules are too rigid but I also need more structure. This isn't directed at you- just DCUM.

Not sure what you mean by the opposite of ellyn satter. We provide the food and she can chose if she eats it. Do you mean the milk thing? [/quote]

Different people are going to tell you different things.

Kids choosing what they eat at meals or choosing when to have snacks or eating wherever isn’t DOR.  With DOR you choose when meals and snacks happen and what is served, the kid chooses from what is served and can have as much as they want.

I am not saying DOR is what you need but I don’t think you can say you are doing it.  I also think that if you aren’t doing any of the structure parts of DOR it might speak to a lack of structure in general.[/quote]

I think you are confused about what I'm saying- I provide the food and chose can chose what to eat as in she can decide if she eats and how much. We eat at 7, 12 and 6. It's not like I ask her hey what would you like for lunch today. She is allowed snacks if she asks for them but doesn't ask that often. [/quote]

Where does she can eat wherever she wants fit in?  DOR would have you add 3 snacks seated at the table. [/quote]

We eat breakfast lunch and dinner together as a family, thanks to the pandemic. At the table. She can eat her raisins in the backyard for all I care. [/quote]

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