Reply to How to cope with a huge drop in living standard for you and the kids post-divorce?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here, it would be helpful to hear from people who have actually had to cope with this situation or who lived through it as kids. The bickering about NC and food stamps and relocationg, all of which are not options, doesn't really help me. I am extremely stressed and would love advice from those who have made it through.

I saw a career counselor who was pretty grim and the finances are really tough. After my long stretch out of the workforce it will be tough to find something that pays more than childcare, never mind covers new clothes and commuting. STBX has a lot of issues I didn't go into, the idea of going without health insurance and possibly having something happen to me terrifies me, he would not be able to raise the kids. Not much extended family, mostly elderly or without spare $ to help. So, I'm it. Babysitting might work if I had an infant or toddler but I have multiple kids. There really was no money for him to leave. We can't move into a 1 br, it violates zoning, can't afford to stay where we are and can't afford something else. 2 DC have asthma so roach infested places or basements are out, or at least in our old life they would have been. I can't believe I was worried about organic milk and early puberty (a risk for DD) just a few days ago, now it's having $ for food in a few months. Just surreal. While he is living the high life. And if his affair ends we are even more screwed financially, he was clear that he would rent a 1 br for himself. There just isn't $.

If anyone had a helpful therapist or coach as you went through this I could really use some support.  [/quote]

Can you stay with friends temporarily, at least until you can find a job?[/quote]

Unfortunately, no. Two friends who would be possiblities have had changes in their own circumstances. No one has an extra br. I'd couch surf if it was just me but there are the kids.[/quote]

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