Reply to S/O maximum number of kids to ensure dual working couple

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Amy Coney Barrett and her husband both work with 7 kids.[/quote]

Didn't they have a family member living with them to help with the kids?   Someone like that can make a huge difference.  It's basically a SAHP who's not actually a parent. [/quote]

I actually hate examples like her. She always talks with pride about balancing kids and a career but it’s all a lie. They have an aunt come daily to “help” with the kids. It sounds more like the aunt functions as a SAHM for Amy abd her husband. I’ve seen this work with live-in grandparents too.

People like Amy are basically relying on another person’s unpaid labor and further undervaluing that labor by pretending they can do it all. [/quote]

Yup.

And it particularly annoys me when you point out that having family support like this obviously helps make it all work, and people will dismiss it out of hand, like "Oh, we don't rely on my mom that much, just a couple afternoons a week and when we have date nights." Which, one, is a TON of help (equivalent to several hundred dollars worth of childcare per week)l. And two, it's never just that. It's also having someone who can spend the night with the kids in an emergency. It's having a childcare option for whom you never have to worry about a background check or whether your kid is going to freak out about them. It's having wiggle room in everything from school drop off to having someone around to watch your older kid when you go into labor to having someone to call if someone is running a fever and you are debating the ER. People dismiss this kind of help as minimal because it makes them feel good about themselves. But for those of us who don't have it, it's like a cheat code. Sure, we're both "working parents" but our circumstances are not really even comparable. It's like pretending you and someone who makes half your salary are in roughly equivalent economic situations. You're not.[/quote]

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