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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here - Thanks, PPs.  And I'm sorry to those who have had to deal with this kind of situation - it feels like a special kind of hell.

Kids are both in elementary school and they don't know AP exists, yet. So they don't seem to understand why we might do Thanksgiving and Christmas separately. They do know we are divorcing, so I have made it about that. A clean break is what I would selfishly like to do, but I worry about how that will affect them. I would prefer to never speak to him again, but obviously that is not realistic. [/quote]

You don't need to speak to him.  Do everything by email and text.  He can have them in the day for Thanksgiving and you can have them after 5PM.  Reverse for Christmas.  You need to make a custody plan with him and then make a calendar so they know what's going on.  They will figure out the AP soon enough so he needs to go ahead and tell them.  They probably know more than you realize.  Best wishes.  It sucks.[/quote]

OP here - Thank you. I have basically gone no contact with him unless it is specifically about our kids. Sadly, he doesn't even care about having them for holidays this year. When I mentioned that we should just split them up and move forward, he was all to happy to give them all to me. He just wants to spend them with his AP.[/quote]

Then, tell him to get out of the house, go be with her, file for child support and divorce and move on.  Nothing you can do.  Sorry you are going through that.[/quote]

+100 Get all of this in writing NOW. Physical custody, all the holidays, and child support based on 100% physical custody. At some point he's going to come out of his sex haze, but by then you'll have the paperwork signed and filed. [/quote]

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