Reply to S/O Is it rude to tell my MIL she can't look at my phone?

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Reply to "S/O Is it rude to tell my MIL she can't look at my phone?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Glad to know I'm not alone in thinking this is nuts.

I agree it was partly just a generational misunderstanding on her part. However, she has always been really nosy about my life and not just as it relates to my kids or even my marriage. Like she regularly asks me really nosy questions about my obstetric health, [b]my job, my friends, and my own family[/b]. I always deflect -- it's just how she is and I'm used to it by now (and my DH always backs me up, though he does encourage me to go easy on her). But I think part of the reason it made me think that she's nosing around other places is because she consistently refuses to acknowledge my privacy or discomfort around a topic. The fact that she'd just go cruising through the photos on my phone (which, for the record, neither her sister or husband chose to do -- they are the same age and seemed to understand implicitly that you don't just go flipping all the way through) does make me wonder in what other ways is she breezing right past conventional boundaries on the hunt for info about my life.[/quote]

I just wanted to flag this. She sounds nosy, and it’s clear you don’t like her, but asking about your job, friends, and family seem like normal friendly overtures to me. If she didn’t ask you about yourself, wouldn’t you feel overlooked? (I’ll give you obstetric health—that’s invasive if you aren’t close).

I had a tough relationship with my MIL so I get your feelings, but it helped me to keep thinking, during MIL’s visits, “if my own mom said this, would I still respond this way?” Because it is easy to get tetchy and overreact to behaviors and comments you would shrug off if they came from someone you liked. [/quote]

Asking about my job is fine. Asking “Do you feel like it’s a dead end since you haven’t had a promotion in 5 years?” Is nosy and rude.

She nosy.[/quote]

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