Reply to Can you discipline a 19 month old?

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Reply to "Can you discipline a 19 month old?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My pediatrician told me to limit "no!" to really serious stuff, like running in the street. Otherwise she said they start to ignore it. She said otherwise we should do things like "we eat our food. Food is not for throwing."

Also, just try and avoid the situations as much as possible. If they are throwing their food, for example, give them just one bite at a time. If they are climbing on chairs to get to the table, just get rid of the chairs for awhile.

This all would've sounded silly to me with my first child, but my second child is like OP's. "No" just isn't working right now.[/quote]

In addition to the above:

One thing about toddlers (1 and young 2 year old children) is that they hear the LAST WORD of the sentence.  You know how they are repeating that last word right now as they learn language?  you say "We're going to go on a walk."  and they say "walk".  right.  So you need the [b]last word of your sentence be what you WANT THEM TO DO.[/b]   it takes a bit of time to learn this, (toddler teachers are good at this if they are good teachers) .... so you say

Please walk.   (rather than don't run)
Feet on the floor! (instead of no climbing)

Also, keep your phrases short - not "please keep your feet on the floor so you don't fall."  or "if you keep throwing things off your tray I am going to take your plate away, did you hear me?  Just Feet on the floor.    Food on your plate.

Then, they are easily distracted at this age ("squirrel!" so if they are heading to something you won't want them to touch AND you can't get rid of it (electrical sockets and plugs) then you say "ooh, look at THIS!   and shake the thing you just grabbed (toy, plastic box, your keys, whatever).  USE their easy distractability to your advantage right now!

And, yes, try to remove the things they love to do that are unsafe.  Understand they are trying to figure out their world, and cause and effect, so throwing food off the tray and watching it hit the floor is fun - they are seeing if all things fall the same way, if it happens the same way every time, and even "will Mom/Dad get angry this time if I do it like last time or not?  So give them less on their tray.  usually a hungry baby and toddler will tuck into their meal quickly and not toss stuff - when s/he gets to the tossing overboard stage you can be probably assured that s/he is full and can get down.  Take most of the stuff off the tray, keep 2 pieces on the tray, if those both go overboard, get the baby down, wash hands and move on!  Not in a negative, punitive way, just a "you must be done" kind of way.

Honestly, they aren't trying to piss you off - just are little scientists trying to figure out their world - but man, it's frustrating when their food hits the floor, or they try to pull the lamp cord off the table for the 4 millionth time!

also, remember that "discipline" isn't really what you are going for in these early years - you are going for "guidance" and "self-discipline."  So guide them to do what you want, not disciplining because they didn't 
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