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[quote=Anonymous]Wow OP you remind me of my ex dh.  All I can tell you is that my kids are 13 and 17 now and they aren't very fond of their dad.  I am considering moving out of the area and my younger one's reaction was "yay, no more regular visits with dad".  The irritability, meanness, all he is too them is an authoritative boss.  He only pays attention to them when there's something negative to say.  His idea of spending time with them for years was having them tag along when he went to the homes of his friends for beer and football.  He doesn't know how to be a dad either - I think because his dad was not interested in him as a kid.

My dad used to take me for long walks around the neighborhood.  He'd include me when he did handyman stuff around the house.  He taught me how to ride a bike.  He built me a doll house.  We redecorated my room together.  When I was little he would play fight/wrestle with us.  He would snuggle me when we watched TV when I was little.  He would take us on hikes on the weekend.  He would take us sailing in the summers.  Camping.  Fishing.

You can't fake genuine enjoyment in the company of another person, particularly your own child.

My advice is find a shared interest and find a way to engage with them on that with enthusiasm.  You are fortunate that they are young enough, it's not too late.  With at least one kid, I would think sports might be an easy fall back?  What do they like to do?[/quote]

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