Reply to Giving in to DH's porn "needs" = Good Wife or Bad Wife?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Stop attacking Church Lady.  Why is she automatically wrong?  I have written on other threads that paying someone for sexual behavior of any kind is unethical -- whether you believe in Jesus or not.  If porn and such are such a big deal why do we treat anyone involved in the sex industry like lepers?  If your SO had worked as a porn actor and you knew it would you have continued the relationship?  Would you be okay with your kids doing it like Laurence Fishburne's daughter did?  The hypocrisy disgusts me more than the porn.[/quote]

This is not what Church Lady is talking about. She's saying that porn is guaranteed to wreck a marriage which is obviously BS. Beyond that, I think she's getting ridiculed for her obscene self-righteousness not her religion.[/quote]

I never said porn is guaranteed to wreck a marriage.  Responses to my points always exaggerate them into unrecognizable straw men.  This is frustrating, but understandable.

And I honestly apologize if anyone perceives my words as self-righteous.  I didn't write the rules, and I am just as flawed as we all are when it comes to following them.  But the rules don't change.  And the only way to be truly, genuinely, completely happy and fulfilled is to follow the instructions.  That's not meant to be mean.

Sex is one of the greatest gifts humans were given.  Because of free will, it can be turned into something unspeakably evil (rape, child molestation) or something that gives us a glimpse of divinity (self-giving, bliss, unity).  There are plenty of lesser evils and lesser goods along that spectrum.  Any time we settle for anything less than what sex was intended to be, we're missing out.  And it's not hard to cross the line to actual misuse.

Porn is one of those misuses that is so wrong, you don't even need to be aware of the full meaning of sex to see its harmful effects.  And while it has always been around, because humans have always misused sex, it has recently taken on a new degree of harm, because of the Internet.  This is acknowledged by a variety of secular observers, especially law enforcement.

OP is in pain.  She is mistaken if she convinces herself that deadening herself to the pain is the solution.  The real solution requires sacrifice, and hard work, and a willingness to change, and a great deal of respect for women.  But it is absolutely possible.

OP, men from all backgrounds have turned away from porn.  "Everyone is going it" is NOT TRUE, and it would not be an excuse if it were.  Have faith in your husband's virtue and manliness, and appeal to them.  He is strong enough to love you completely.  It will be a lifelong task, but that is what love is all about.[/quote]

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