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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It is their life, not yours.  Sure, help them with a spreadsheet, and then let go.  They either meet the deadlines or they end up at Community College...[/quote]

Community College is not part of our family's plans.  We will do what's necessary to maximize my family members' outcome and CC does not fit that bill.  You can choose not to.[/quote]

It is not "your family's outcome." It is his (or hers) alone. They have to attend college solo, and succeed for fail there. You are not helping them prepare for those years by being too quick to jump in and save them now.[/quote]

By doing this now, I'm freeing him up to focus on his school and essays.  We teach our kids to swim, not throw them in the water and hope they survive.  Assuming I do nothing and he ends up at a CC, his lifetime earnings and lifestyle will be impacted.  How dumb that you'd be OK with that?  Depends on the family, I suppose..[/quote]

I was not dumb. I raised a responsible kid who did what she had to and got into 7 schools, with 7 merit scholarships.

She accomplished all of that because I had taught HER to handle such tasks, not because I did them for her.

I am sorry your child is not like that. I have certainly helped my child in the past. All I am asking you to consider is whether this has been your pattern all along, so your child relies on it.

Kids like that sometimes crash and burn at college they have NO practice managing their own lives. Just a word of caution. [/quote]

Sorry if I came across as mean.  Your child is probably a go-getter who's normally on top of things and takes full responsibility.  Mine is selective in terms what he wants to focus on so in areas where he is not, we need to push him or help out.  I'd rather he get to a good college and let him fail than fail now and go to CC.
Question for you.. what would you have done if your daughter did not show much initiative  with college apps knowing fully well how smart she is would you have let her fail and go to CC?   [/quote]

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