Reply to WWYD: DH becoming cheap, workaholic

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, it sounds like you're looking for some magic phrasing that will convince your DH to agree with you, and that just doesn't exist.  The issue here is that you seem to have no say in the budget, or if you do, you're subject to his veto (and he's not subject to yours, since he got that car you didn't want).  That's the issue, and that's something you need to work out.

If he's open to counseling, a few sessions with a couples counselor will really help iron this out.  If not, then you're going to have to decide what you're willing to put up with, what you're not, and what consequences you'll take on.  Are you willing to tell him that you are going to transfer $X to a separate, jointly-owned account just for "fun stuff," and you and he can spend out of that?  Are you willing to do that even if he says no?

You can't control how he feels or how he responds.  Focus on what you can control.  You're a grown-ass adult, and he is not your dad. This is your money too.  Figure out where your line is, and draw it.[/quote]

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