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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm so sorry, OP. It's natural to feel bitter in such a situation.
All the old people I know have behaved in the same way! Distance makes the heart grow fonder, or something silly like that.

My MIL, who is (or was) a very kind and intelligent person, sees no value in her older son's DAILY care-giving, and declared she wanted to settle more inheritance on my husband, who lives thousands of miles away and can only help remotely (he manages some aspects of her finances). I am mortified and pray the rest of the family doesn't resent us... I actually told my MIL several times that I would prefer if she could distribute her money in a way that did not favor my husband, but she insists. I don't get it.
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Then you need to step up or offer at least 50% to brother or it speaks volumes of you.  Be prepared to have to take it all over at some point when he gets fed up.[/quote]

That is a tough situation and your MIL is basically creating a life long family rift. It becomes complicated tax-wise to then give him what he deserves. She is moron not to just split things 50% because she can give a lot to him tax free. I would meet with an accountant to figure out how to equalize the inheritance after MIL is gone in the most tax efficient way possible. Is your BIL aware he is getting shafted?

You say your MIL is/was very kind. This is incredibly disturbed and mentally ill behavior to have no empathy for someone doing so much for her and to purposely punish him. Do you think it is dementia? My mother is doing disturbing things and I am the one helping, but she has always been dysfunctional, lacking empathy, self-centered and entitled and so I am stepping back.[/quote]

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