Reply to Husband has been financially a disappointment

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Husband has been financially a disappointment "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]So here goes. I have been pretty disappointed in my marriage so far due to financial issues. My husband is completely financially illiterate and disinterested in any financial matters. He has no plan and no goals for us to reach as a family. He does not have any retirement savings, he doesn’t have any emergency savings. We have 5 k credit card debt and he has over 109k grad school loans.

We have been living paycheck to paycheck since we met 8 years ago and are empty pocketed after spending 30k on engagement, wedding and honeymoon.

We don’t have any money for a baby. So we aren’t trying for one even though we are pushing our mid 30s.
We have no money for a house 
Or any savings

I feel like I’m drowning. [/quote]
What was your financial plan when you got married?[/quote]

We thought we can make more money.

[/quote]

That's not a plan. That's a wish.

A plan is a planned career trajectory - such as certifications, promotions, goals (e.g. in three years I'd like to be in X position at my firm or move on to another firm).

A plan is a budget, which you both stick to. And a savings account. It's saying, "we're going to save up X amount by the end of 2021. We want a house in Y neighborhood". Etc, etc.

If you are bringing in 3K a month and he brings in a bit more, and you don't have children, you can easily find a reasonably priced apartment (even a studio) someplace safe but not trendy while you save up. Make a plan together. Take the reigns, since he isn't doing it. You are supposed to be a team - help each other. Share your expectations. Placing your financial issues solely on him is unfair, especially if it's not something you previously agreed to.

If he is unwilling, that's a whole other issue. [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics