Reply to Husband is silent when I most desperately need reassurance and acknowledgment

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What do you want him to say?  And why won't you say that to yourself?[/quote]

Op here. So some of the things I was freaking out about were that DH works an opposite schedule to me so I’m often alone with the children in the evenings. I was telling him I don’t know how Im going to do that if I can’t walk/can’t pick up our one year old. DH also has travel scheduled next week, and I’m going to be possibly needing surgery for my ankle (didn’t know that at the time but I was afraid it might be the case) and it is not something that can be cancelled easily.

What would have helped at the time is if he could have said something like “you know, you’re right, those things are going to be challenging and we are going to have to figure them out.” That’s what I mean by acknowledging/validating. [/quote]

I know the issue you are referring to OP. For me it was solved by communication. Instead of expecting DH to know what to say, I had to tell him what I needed to hear or do. It’s not as sexy as a man just knowing what to do, but over time he will get the hang of it. You just have to vulnerable and say honey I need you right now, I could really use a hug. Or can you please tell me that everything will be alright. DH loves you, but he is still learning you. Just share how you work with him, without a lot of pressure, and let him know you appreciate him. Good luck![/quote]

Agree, and you may have to prompt him...so what do you think, feel about it?  Unless he's a dum dum, he must have some thought process, just not vocal about it.[/quote]

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