Reply to Should my mom come to stay for the first month after birth?

Forum Index » Expectant and Postpartum Moms

Reply to "Should my mom come to stay for the first month after birth? "

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It always baffles me when people say they want to go through the first days together just as a nuclear family. Those are the worst! I come from a culture where women are looked after by their parents for at least 40 days after childbirth, and I can tell you that it helps you recover much faster. My parents came and stayed with me, looked after all of the cooking, laundry, etc. My husband handled the shopping while he was on paternity leave but once he went back to work I took over that task, but otherwise just being able to rest in between feeding the baby was great.[/quote]

DP.  I think the problem is precisely that we don't have the culture of supporting the new mother.  When I tried to have my MIL come help a few days after the baby was born, it was terrible. We weren't used to living with her, and we had [b]no cultural context for the things she was supposed to do and I was supposed[/b] to do.  This may be a MIL-DIL issue as well (my biological mother is not in the picture).  I desperately wanted help, but it ended up being easier in the short term to cope on my own, because my MIL was making it worse.  [/quote]

You were supposed to breastfeed the baby. They MIL was supposed to do everything else as pp mentioned: cooking, laundry, etc. [/quote]

Nope. What I actually needed was someone to take the baby so I could sleep. And for my MIL to just do what I asked instead of fighting me on every detail! Think, the type of MIL who reflexively argues with you when you request anything be done in a certain way. Some people just are not cut out to be nurturers and helpers, which is totally fine ... just not in the immediate post partum period![/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics