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Reply to "Adjusting unrealistic expectations with grandparents as a mom"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I am thinking maybe there is more to the dynamic between your MIL and you than you mention. You say "we only talk to her when I prod DH to calling her." Well, how much have YOU tried to initiate a relationship with her? This is very very similar to another recent post on DCUM. One of the points made there was that the relationship between a daughter with kids and her own parents is a much different dynamic than a daughter-in-law and her MIL. Perhaps your MIL is in the "damned if I do, damned if I don't" segment. Maybe you have come across as distant and cool, and she figures she doesn't want to intrude unless invited. If she were to initiate, like other MILs do, then she might be snapped at because she is over-involved. [/quote] I reach out to her a lot but it's the same - vague plans about seeing the family, etc. I have been as direct as I can in inviting her to see us, sharing photos, asking after her etc., but nothing changes.[/quote]
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