Reply to Are hot women less likely to have solid marriages?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Yes.  My husband is hot.as hell.  He’s smart and successful too.  Everyone comments on it.  Women of all ages, even men.  I met him when he was 24.  He’s 49 now.  I have seen women throw themselves at him throughout our marriage. I’ve seen women that are stuffy, intellectual, prudish turn into stumbling school girls around him.

I am 50.  I am the whole package, very smart, great career, Graduate degrees, very athletic, funny, etc.  We were told we are the couple everyone wants to swing with because neither partner in the other relationship would be the “loser” (usually one person in the marriage is more attractive and it becomes more apparent over time).  I get hit on a lot.  I’m told I’m beautiful, etc.  I have aged incredibly well. Thank you olive skin and good genetics. I still have a 6-pack after having 2 kids and look great in a bikini, no stretch marks or cellulite.

It’s strange being married to a guy like this because it does keep you on your A game.  I have always worked out hard 6 days per week and taken meticulous care of my skin.  I’ve always been slightly insecure.  I have seen women that are friends flirt shamelessly with my husband.  One neighbor texted both of us yesterday to say how great he looked during quarantine.  Wtf? Who does that.

He has always made me feel beautiful.  He has always done great things for me.  We have always had a great sex life, 3-4 times per week.

Midlife he he cheated with some grumpily woman he met on the Internet.  She was older and never worked.  She was not attractive.  What she did do was fawn over him and tell him how handsome and incredible his body was.  She had never been with a guy that ripped, muscular and attractive.  He’s a narcissist.  He needs excessive validation.  A lot of really good looking guys are narcissists.  This is why their marriages end up having problems.  They need that excessive attention.  He had a very traumatic childhood.  His mother tried to shoot his father.  His father was very good looking and a serial cheater, alcoholic.  His dad was a malicious narcissist.[/quote]

Well it does sound like there is a narcissist and it’s not your DH. It’s sounds like he needed some attention/affection from a woman that you did not give him. [/quote]

Oh pleeasse.  If you know anything about a clinical narcissist, they will never get enough attention/satisfy their ego from a long time marriage.  They need the 'bread crumbs' and constant validation from outside.[/quote]

Agree.  My husband is in heavy therapy after being diagnosed a clinical narcissist.  Treatment involves his therapist checking in with me every couple weeks to verify since narcs can lie seamlessly.  He said narcissism is due to early childhood trauma.  My husband had a similar father.  You could see the severe need my husband had to be admired by everyone.  No one woman could continually provide that for a narc or decades. Every narc cheats at some point.  [/quote]

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