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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, just say no.  They can’t force you to help (although they’ll be entitled to their own feelings about it).

Realistically, even if your MIL went there to help, she’d need other people to give her a break once in a while because caregiver fatigue is very real.  So even if she moved there, there would still be a schedule for others to help out too.[/quote]

Why does she need a break?

SIL is OK. She’s not on her death bed.
She just needs rides to the hospital and back and gets tired after procedures. Between that she still works and does stuff.[/quote]

If your SIL doesn't need that much care, then she doesn't need anyone staying with her for weeks at a time.  She can uber back and forth to the hospital and order in food when she's tired.[/quote]

Exactly.

OP here. The situation is bizarre.

SIL with cancer us still working full time out of home. She lives with her 16 year old DD. He ex also lives with them, so he could have driven her.

The whole thing was orchestrated by another SIL who decided that everyone should show up to show support. So she sent out a sign up “which day do you want to come?”

DH drove 4 hours there, drove his sister for a procedure, sat in the hospital for several hours trying to work and do meetings and then drove her back home and drove 4 hours home.  All while she could have driven herself or taken an Uber or have her ex drive her.
 
Is it not odd?[/quote]

No, your DH did exactly what I would expect my husband to do for his siblings if he had any.  And because he doesn't, it is exactly what he will do for my siblings and their spouses as well as my parents.  I find your response shockingly odd and extremely disheartening.

You really think your SIL should Uber home after having a cancer procedure?  That's sick.[/quote]

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