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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]As someone who is dating a divorced dad of two teen boys....this makes me sad. I’m wondering what I can do to avoid having similar dynamics develop? His kids are polite to me which is about the best I hope for as I think it’s hard for people to like their parent’s partner.[/quote]

Do you have kids of your own?

Politeness on all sides is pretty good if you ask me!

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Thanks. No, no kids of my own. [/quote]

There are many books and websites out there that can help you understand the stepmother dynamic and why it is often a losing game.  There are also forums for step parents that can offer you insights. Wednesday Martin  has written some insightful pieces about it:

"My marriage was meant to be. It was also doomed to fail. You see, I chose a man with children. Experts estimate that more than half of all adult women in the U.S. will do the same in their lifetimes, and that [b]up to 70% of those partnerships will fail.[/b] Factor in all the odds and on the day I said “I do,” I might as well have picked out a divorce lawyer as well: the greatest predictor of divorce is the presence of children from a previous marriage."

Sobering stats for those with children, considering remarriage.

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