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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’ve been there twice.  [b]It’s a part of the cycle of life, and it won’t be forever. [/b] You’ll miss them when they are gone, but you’ll feel content that you did everything possible to make them comfortable in their latter days, as you hope your children will support you when it is time.[/quote]

Except it can be close to forever when someone lives a long time. My mom is a saint, she cared for my grandmother (who was awful to her) until my grandmother died...at 102.[/quote]

And my father lived in Skilled Nursing for 4 long years, coded once, was revived, went on hospice for a year and died in his sleep at age 85.

Tell my widowed mom who practically lived at his bedside and hired companion sitters so that she could nap or buy groceries that "it won't be forever." It seemed like forever for the family.

And don't tell me that I'll miss my parent (now) that he's gone. I forgave him and moved on to my own young family and their needs.

Despite my father being a nasty, abusive drunk, I still tried to be the dutiful daughter and visit as often as I could. I will never move my own mom or ILs in with us. Ever. In fact, DH and I are planning a cross country move in the near future. My mom has made arrangements to move into what was my father's nursing home eventually.

[/quote]

This. It does turn into forever some time. We had an ordeal that went 8 years with Alzheimers and other illnesses. I don't miss it, not one bit. I miss the person I lost many years ago. I already did the mourning throughout the endless Alzheimer's process. I feel relief that I don't have to watch a loved one die a horrible death day after day.

The sooner you get your used to outside help the better. Also, the sooner you set boundaries the better. I didn't set enough boundaries and became the target of a barrage of verbal abuse repeatedly. [/quote]

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