Reply to How to relate to SIL who shows no unhappy emotions ever?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here! Thanks for the responses.
My sense is it's a [b]defense mechanism[/b], and it makes it really hard to talk about anything with her when she immediately shifts gears into something superficial; I guess I feel I can't be myself and have to always be "up" as well, or else she completely cannot relate. It's like she can't talk about anything uncomfortable (except that one time). She also posts on Instagram daily about inspirational quotes and sayings. As I said, it doesn't really affect me (except she is also our neighbor, so...we interact a lot); but it would help to understand a bit because sometimes I feel frustrated like she's putting on a show and I don't feel we can really talk. Like if I am having a bad day or something and cry in front of her, I feel like an alien.[/quote]

Your question really should be...why is she using this defense mechanism against you?  Think about what I'm asking.  [i]Why does she feel she needs to defend herself from you?[/i]  Her actions speak more to her instincts about you rather than anything about her.  I think she's made the right choice in choosing not to confide in you.[/quote]

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