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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Intellectually, I know it's extremely common and even to be expected that you will gain weight as you age. I've posted about this before, how the # on the scale really effects me. I don't want to live like this but I also don't know how to be ok with it either. I mean, truly ok. Not just something I would tell other people because I know that's how you're supposed to feel but genuinely feel ok about it.

I'm 5'7 and 122 lbs. I want to be 120 because that's what I've been my entire adult life. But I am having an impossible time getting those 2 lbs. off. I realize how utterly absurd it is to mentally obsess about 2 lbs. I don't want to be this way but I can't make myself stop. The worst thing is that I have children and I would die if I thought any of them felt this way about themselves. I try to hide it as much as possible of course.

How did you convince yourself that it is acceptable to gain weight as you get older? Was it something you read?[/quote]

I have posted in your threads before. I am probably one of a very few people who get you. My BMI fluctuates between high 17 and low 18. Up until I was 50, I never counted calories, weighed myself sporadically, and ate anything I wanted. I was a competitive marathon runner and burned off everything I ate. I stopped running for a few years due to health issues but still weighed the same. But quite immediately after my 50th birthday, I found I could no longer eat anything I wanted. During this pandemic, I gained 5 lbs and was appalled. I’m doing 18:6 IF, running 25 miles a week, starting a strength program, and counting calories. I was so frustrated that I could not lose the last 3 lbs. finally, I got a fitness watch that tracks calories burned. I finally could see how little exercise burns compared to that piece of cake I want. I’m finally losing the weight and I feel great.

People on here keep saying I have an eating disorder but I don’t and never did. I wouldn’t say I’m obsessed or rigid. For example, I’ll eat things my kids bake or buy even if it’s outside my eating window. Food and cooking is a hobby. I’m healthy and strong. I wear shorts or bikinis and feel good in them. I know it’s weird to want to be a certain weight just because it was the same weight I was in freshman year of college. And I know it’s weird that I kept my high school graduation dress and sometimes put it on to see if it still fits (By sometimes, I mean once every half decade or so). But weird doesn’t mean I have a eating disorder. My kids don’t have eating disorders either. [/quote]

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