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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Healthy adults don’t put their lives on hold leaving their home, their friends, their property, their routines for an indefinite period of time no matter how muchthey like you.  A week, yes, two weeks, yes, but not for an open-ended period of time.  Your mom is not a healthy individual.

As for you, healthy adults don’t say “look after my kid, but do not discipline that child”.

From what you describe, your mom sounds like a cruel woman, or at best mentally ill, see my point above re adults putting their lives on hold.

Your mom’s wanting you to leave the house while you work is also odd, where exactly is she expecting you to go? I had to read the date on your op because based on that comment alone, I thought maybe you’d posted it back in January.  That comment alone would make me wonder about your mom’s situational awareness.

Based on your instructions to your mom, I wonder about you too.

If you are deriving any pleasure or comfort from your mom and she wants to stay, have her stay. Give your kid an ipad and let her hang out with you while you work.

Taking care of other people’s kids is way harder then taking care of your own.  Older people remember a world that was very different from our world. My mom clearly remembers calling an ambulance (not 911, a 7-digit number) to take me to the hospital when I was a baby. She said you had a list of numbers written down by the phone, hoped like hell you didn’t need it, and when you did, hope that someone hadn’t torn off the sheet of paper, thrown it away or smeared the number.

My mom was an e.m.t, and is comfortable around medical “stuff” and I am now a healthy adult.  Despite all this, that day 40 years ago still scares her on a very deep level.   We live an in environment with a lot of room for error that previous generations, even one generation distant simply didn’t have.

Think about how your mom behaves when she’s not expected to do childcare and decide from there what you’d like to do.  Just because she’s doing you a favor and/or providing free childcare doesn’t mean you deserve to be treated poorly. That’s true of all of us.   
 
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Ha ha, what? OP’s mom is not a healthy individual because she came to help her daughter in a time of need? Then I guess my parents are unhealthy because they did the same!

I swear, some of you must have been raised by wolves. You have so few family values. Actually, wolves are much better than you.[/quote]

I agree.  Even wolf mothers know when and why it is important to discipline their pups - and know it's for their own good and survival.  Just about every animal species disciplines their offspring usually with a mild nip, smack or growl.  It's only in the last few decades humans starting thinking it wasn't necessary and was abuse.  Some decided psychology was more important than biology and thus we have a society where offspring lead the pack, not the other way around.

"We live an in environment with a lot of room for error that previous generations, even one generation distant simply didn’t have."  Oh, OK.  What a laugh and obviously someone who has absolutely no knowledge of history, not even recent history.  And was probably raised in the lap of luxury without ever knowing a day of hunger or whether the roof would still be over their head.

Ever heard of cars with no seatbelts, let alone car seats?  How about being drafted and worrying about whether the next step in a rice paddy would be an "error."  What about growing up in a country where corruption reigned, gangs ruled and parents could make an "error" and look the wrong way at someone, then disappear without a trace?   Leaving your kids to fend for themselves on the streets.

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