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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Can someone explain the mindset of a cheater?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]For me it wasn’t the sex with another person that I find unforgivable. The lies I was told so they could have that side relationship is what hurts the most. [/quote] I have never understood this. Isn't the reason for the lie to facilitate the cheating? Could your spouse have said "I am going to shag Larla" and that would have been fine? Not trying to be rhetorical.[/quote] NP. Because the lie was the essence of the manipulation. My now exDH knew I was not open to non-monogamous sex. By lying and sleeping with someone else while continuing also to sleep with me, he manipulated me into a kind of sex I had explicitly told him I didn’t want. I felt violated. His lying and manipulation in order to sleep with other people while he was sleeping with me felt like a form of rape. [/quote]
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