Reply to Focused on the Children - death knell for your Marriage?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]The fact is that raising kids well takes up a ton of time and resources. There is no way out of that if you want to do a good job. So, it is important to choose a partner who understands the marriage may take a back seat in the early years. Hopefully everyone can maintain their ability to see the big picture and that kids grow up and very quickly become much less energy and time sucking than in the very early years. But the solution is not to ignore the kids in favor of the marriage. That is bad for the family unit. [/quote]

I agree. I don’t think our marriage ever took a back seat because we both accepted that chaos would reign for a good ten years or so. We were definitely in it together and both of us were incredibly busy with both work and family to varying degrees. The romance and one on one time of the pre-kid years definitely took a hit but the joy of having children really brought us together. We did keep up an active sex life but the romantic pre-kid weekends went out the window. Now we are empty nesters and we love or time together but I do miss the young family adventure. The key is having the right partner but you never know until the babies show up whether you made a good choice. [/quote]

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