Reply to Wife chronically depressed, blames everyone everything for her unhapiness&unfullfillment, I want out

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Reply to "Wife chronically depressed, blames everyone everything for her unhapiness&unfullfillment, I want out"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi OP,

Sorry you are going through this.

Counseling for you.

Psychiatrist for her (to adjust her meds).  Therapists can't
adjust meds so I'm not sure why people are recommending 
a therapist.

You can't force someone to get mental health help in our society.[/quote]

Thank you.[/quote]

She needs both a psychiatrist and a therapist.  Meds are only 1 part but cognitive behavioral therapy is extremely helpful too.

To the OP, it's not as easy as her just not wanting to enjoy life.  When I have a really bad episode of depression/anxiety I just can't find joy in anything. It's not that I don't want to.  It's that I am incapable of feeling it.  Anxiety and depression completely drain you of energy.  It takes every waking minute and every fiber in my body just to exist.

Exercise will help, but she needs to have enough energy first to attempt that. My doc put me on Welbutrin recently (in addition to Celexa) and it's helped my energy levels A LOT!

Trust me when I say that her criticism of you has very little to do with you and ALL to do with how she feels about herself.  She is miserable and unhappy and it's not your fault.

I tend to criticise and take it out on the people I love the most too.  I feel absolutely horrible about it but they are the people I feel the most comfortable with with they get the brunt.  It creates this cycle of me taking it out on them, feeling guilty for doing it, feeling absolutely shitty about myself as a result, which results in me being even more depressed and taking it out on them again.

I think you are absolutely entitled to happiness and peace in your home.  She will never get better on her own though.  I would suggest you tell her that she either gets serious about medication and therapy NOW or you will leave.

It sucks for everyone involved. [/quote]

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