Toggle navigation
Toggle navigation
Home
DCUM Forums
Nanny Forums
Events
About DCUM
Advertising
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics
FAQs and Guidelines
Privacy Policy
Your current identity is: Anonymous
Login
Preview
Subject:
Forum Index
ยป
Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Wife chronically depressed, blames everyone everything for her unhapiness&unfullfillment, I want out"
Subject:
Emoticons
More smilies
Text Color:
Default
Dark Red
Red
Orange
Brown
Yellow
Green
Olive
Cyan
Blue
Dark Blue
Violet
White
Black
Font:
Very Small
Small
Normal
Big
Giant
Close Marks
[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I've been where you are, OP. It sucks. You need to triage while still moving forward on good health for both of you. 1. Continue with relationship counselling so you both better understand what uncontrolled depression is doing to your relationship -identify concrete steps you both need to take improve your mental health and relationship -agree to a timeline for the steps to be completed -these steps should include you both seeing her prescribing psychiatrist to adjust medication. You need to provide imput into the symptoms you see 2. Do a check on your own mental health. Depression is 'contagious'. 3. You may want to see an individual counselor to help you work through what this is doing to you, including figuring out what you're going to do if/when she doesn't comply with the steps in #1 4. Start getting your own financial house in order in the event you separate. Plan for the worst, hope for the best. While depression is a legitimate health issue and may explain behavior/challenges, it cannot be used as an excuse. Your DW does have choices. If she does not choose to seek treatment, your life and your relationship will not get any better. At some point, you will likely develop depression. It's also not a healthy environment for kids. That was the issue for me. When I realized that my own health was negatively impacted by living with XDH and that our kids were better off, I left. Despite my best efforts (making appointments for him, being ready to drive him to the appts, etc.), he chose not to take the helping hands that were offered to him. People can spew all they want about him not being 'able' to take those hands. Doesn't matter. The marriage vows I took don't require me to jeopardize my own well being by staying in the marriage. I have a responsibility to myself and to our kids. Good luck. [/quote] thank you for this. I do feel my own mental health and sanity starting to slip. I have personal financial and other goals I'd like to achieve- we have joint goals we would like to acheive...and everything is on hold because there is no moving forward. Walking in place. Traveling without moving. I think I am open to let's say a 6 month goal of active work. But after that, something has got to give. THis is no way to live.[/quote]
Options
Disable HTML in this message
Disable BB Code in this message
Disable smilies in this message
Review message
Search
Recent Topics
Hottest Topics