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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]In my family, it is my brother. He's the middle child. My mom has always claimed that she would never let him suffer for being the middle child, like she did. The result is an over-coddled man-baby. My parents bailed him out of foreclosure twice. Then he turned up on their doorstep with his mistress pleading homelessness. (He had a perfectly fine home with his wife and 2 children THAT MY PARENTS BAILED OUT OF FORECLOSURE TWICE) They've bought him multiple cars. He currently lives with aforementioned mistress and her 3 children from her marriage, and the 2 children they have together, in the house we grew up in, rent-free.

In DH's family, it is his sister. she is 6 years younger than him, attended college close to home (DH went 4 days drive away). MIL and SIL have this terribly co-dependent relationship. SIL says jump and MIL says "how high?" Currently SIL is attempting to hold Christmas Eve dinner hostage to her various whims and MIL is falling for it (me, I'm holding firm to the 5:00 reservation we have!). But SIL is largely incapable of being an adult. She has a nice job, but taking care of her kid? Managing her house? Basic adult things like keeping your car registration current? Nope. Can't do it, calls MIL crying, MIL takes care of it all. MIL loooooooves feeling needed.

In both cases, my brother and SIL are remarkably self-centered people who have spent their 30+ years upon this earth having every obstacle bulldozed out of their way by mothers who have their identity incredibly intertwined with their child. [/quote]

Reading this was such a great reminder that my job is to successfully launch my kids, not derive my identity from them thus rendering them incapable. Thank you.[/quote]

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