Reply to Guilt that won’t subside over having an only

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]NP here. Why do you think you will be unhappy having a second child? I feel so much joy watching my kids  (4 and 1.5 years old) play. I’m an only child and I keep thinking I never had this growing up.

I hated being an only child then and now. I was so lonely. It didn’t help that I have a super introverted mom. A lot of ppl say it’s nice for kids to have siblings do that they can play together but for me, I want them to always have each other even when my DH and I are gone. Now, I am dealing with aging parents alone and how I wish I have a brother or sister to share the worries with.[/quote]
She thinks she would be unhappy with a second child because she knows herself. You don't know her at all, and you're projecting your own stuff onto her.

BTW, I have siblings and that "share the worries" thing doesn't always work out the way you think it will. [/quote]

I’m not protecting my own stuff to her. I asked her why she thinks she would be unhappy having a second child. Most of the posters on this thread are not only childs. I’m sharing my experience as an unhappy only child. When I meet other only childs, we talked about how lonely we were growing up and how we did not like being the center of our parents attention constantly. To your point about having siblings who are not able to share the worries with, I get that. I hope both my kids would grow up close and there is a 50% chance they won’t be close. But that’s a hell lot more than 0% if my older child does not have a younger brother. I’m envious of my friends now who has siblings and they do things together, travel and just able to share things with. I have never met anyone who wish he/she is like me, an only child.
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I'm sorry you had a tough childhood. However, I can guarantee you that there are people who wish their siblings didn't exist. My husband, mom, and dad know they would have been happier without their siblings. So don't generalize. In many ways, it's easier to not have a sibling than to have a horrible sibling relationship. [/quote]

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