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Reply to "How do you parent with a husband who won't?"
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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I understand your situation and your frustrations. My DH was also raised by a single mother who struggled to make ends meet, and he grew up with little supervision and structure. They were very poor, and his mother also died early of the effects of alcoholism. He didn't have good role models either and has just the tendencies you describe. But that said, I think you should recognize that your DH obviously loves your kids a lot and does show that love by doing what he thinks will help them. That is something to appreciate and be grateful for, and you should recognize that in how you think about him and talk to him. At the same time, I agree with you that you need to instill more structure than your DH does. My DH was very driven and successful, but making it out of a small Midwestern community 30 years ago was very different than dealing with all the demands put on kids in this area today. I try to get him to see that, but in the end of the day I am the one supplying structure. I don't complain about it. It is what it is. Maybe that helps me win the arguments. But with the kids, you need their buy-in. You need to get them to see why controlli8ng screen usage and getting enough sleep matters. Maybe I am lucky, but we have done that--I think by dictating less and conversing more. And I keep emphasizing that they need to be their own self-monitors more as they get older. We have one with ADHD too, and it is not easy. I get that.[/quote]
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