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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. Sorry, did not mean to sound awful or judgmental. In fact, I am scared that I’d park myself in front of the TV in my 80s, given out shared biology. I love him and I am concerned. I took him to a gerontologist and a psychiatrist. He had his meds adjusted and started doing better (he is on Prozac) in terms of his mood. I do think, and the doctors told me that encouraging activity will help his quality of life; attempting to learn the language will help keep his mind sharp. As to the eldercare - PP above is right on the spot. If he goes there for a couple hours a time he can at least play chess with someone and talk. It will also give me piece of mind while I am at work. He’ll be forced to socialize, learn things, maybe even exercise. He was amazed to be able to re-learn to go up and down the stairs. I made him do it every day after much protests and arguments. Also, I did not notice a personality change, but the decline in physical activity is noticeable.[/quote]

My heart goes out to you OP. My mom is in her mid 70s and we are going through some of this with her. She has very early stage Parkinson's, and her doctor has said over and over that she needs to be active in order to preserve as much mental and physical functioning as possible - but she feels better just sitting on the couch most of the time. And she feels depressed about her loss of mobility, and how tired she is, and it makes her want to give up, too.

We - me, my sibling, my dad - do our best to encourage her to do more. She does some things - has a book club and takes some classes - but is largely sedentary, and it is breaking my heart to think of her deteriorating more than she has to.

I keep trying to remind myself that it is up to her, if she wants to do more or not - and nagging her isn't going to make a difference. But then I feel very badly for maybe not pushing enough.

I don't have any answers, just a huge amount of empathy. Good luck to you and your dad.[/quote]

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