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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I could have written that word for word. And I'm happy to know someone in the world feels the same way. It's been 12 years for me and he is steadily in my dreams and random thoughts. The last time I saw him was the night I got engaged to DH. We ran into him on a side street in s city of 4 million people. Havent seen or had any contact since and my brain just cannot let it go.[/quote]

NP here, but you definitely aren’t the only one. I have an ex like this that I often dream about 1-3 times a month, probably. I wouldn’t say he takes up that much headspace during the day, but on some subconscious level he must be there because he enters my dreams- all. The. Time. It’s been nearly a decade since I’ve seen him last.

In my case, my relationship with my husband is very stable. Good, but stable. With ex, it was super turbulent. Super low lows, but also super high highs. I think in some sense I miss the excitement and the feeling of those really high highs. The makeup sex was always GREAT. Husband and I barely fight so it’s just not as....passionate?

Anyways...sympathy. Let me know if you find a cure!![/quote]

OP here. Thanks to both of you for sharing. It does help to know I'm not the only one.

To the PP above, I am not living in la la land. I have a wonderful relationship with DH who is the best man I've ever met. I'm lucky, and present, and we have a strong marriage. There is no pining. It's more like I dream about him randomly and not infrequently and that dream carries over for a day or two so that he's in my thoughts. Every time I wake up annoyed and frustrated and say to myself "wtf stop dreaming about him!" I am not pursuing anything with someone I no longer know, who from what I can tell, I have very little in common with. I'm just so tired of it. [/quote]

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