Reply to Vent--No more capacity to deal with DH being a drama llama

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[quote=Anonymous]What if you name the problem?

Tell your DH you're not going to watch the Nats game with him, because his temper tantrum when something inevitably goes wrong is stressful. So while you do wish you and he could wind together in the evening, instead you're going to sit on the deck and read a book. I think a lot of men are so used to the women around them managing and ignoring their moods that they're completely unaware of how childish they're being.

My own DH thought he was often "hiding" his frustration until I told him I wasn't going to go out to eat with him until he read the menu of the place we were going first. He has legitimate frustration, food allergies make eating out a chore. But he likes eating out, so we'd regularly go, he'd get the menu and ask questions at some new place, and then pout the entire meal if they couldn't accommodate him. I didn't enjoy eating a meal while he was pouting, yet he wouldn't leave to go elsewhere. After a few times of this I decided if he wanted to do performative pouting I didn't need to go along to be his audience. I've heard a lot of women complain about things similar to this, and often they've never expressed to their husband how their behavior is perceived, just assuming their husband knows he's a drama llama. Point it out. Stop accommodating it.[/quote]

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