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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I'm lumping bickering in with arguing. It's still a disagreement. I also am including discussions with opposing opinions in arguing. [/quote]

No, there is a huge difference between bickering and arguing versus discussions with opposing opinions.[/quote]

See m, I call all of that that arguing.  Arguing isn’t always loud or violent.[/quote]

No two human beings agree on literally everything. Some amount of disagreement or conflict happens in every relationship. It is all a matter of degree and frequency. While all of that is 'arguing' I disagree that all of it gets to the core issue of 'if you rarely argue'. Couples who rarely argue are either suppressing their unhappiness to an unhealthy level or they have found a way to progress through conflict with relative ease. I do agree that if a couple literally  NEVER disagrees that something is likely wrong and at least one spouse doesn't feel empowered to express themselves.

But I am in a very low conflict marriage and like other posters it is a combination of how we argue (ie, no raised voices, no festering, open and healthy conversation, generally assuming the best intentions in the other spouse) and the amount of things we allow to bother us (I just don't get too annoyed about a dish left out or a chore forgotten, they are small potatoes in the grand scheme of things).

We do disagree, of course we do, we are different people. But when something comes up we don't yell, we don't assume bad things about the other and their motivations, we don't accuse, we don't dwell in the fight. And none of this is hard because its how we've practiced our relationship. At this point if one of us started yelling it would be so concerning and disconcerting that the other person would be like, 'whoa is something ELSE wrong?'. It would be almost as shocking as slapping the other person. We just don't do it. [/quote]

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