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Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)
Reply to "Spouses who travel or move a lot for work- how do you deal?"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I just wanted to show you some support OP. My husband works and travels very frequently and we have no family near. It is hard. Moving is frustrating too- the starting over. It sounds like DH has already taken the job so now you need to pick up the pieces and get things going on your end in finding a house and such. Since you can't change the situation, best to try and come to terms with it in a positive way. If you can afford it, get a full service move, packing included. It makes moving WAY less stressful. Look at it as a new adventure and new opportunity to make friends. Put a positive spin on it for your kids' sake and maybe you might start thinking that way too about it. [b]And for those comparing this to the military- it isn't comparable. The military largely is its own family and adjusting is quite easy because there is so much help and programs in place for service members at new duty stations. Everyone is constantly coming and going. Plus since no one has family near and many are new, people seek out each other for to form their own support. [/b] [/quote] This is true overseas. It’s not true in the US unless you live on base/post and most do not. [/quote] Disagree. My brother is in the aF; their community is so strong domestically that they decided to stay in for the 20 years, and maybe beyond, plus had four kids, each born in a different state. They have very strong AF community, church community, kid school communities, etc. They are quite involved parents and social. But their AF family is awesome and always helpful if my brother is on a trip or they need help (new baby, SN kids, other help). Only once have they lived on base. They buy in good neighborhoods for the schools and community. Right now they live with a bunch of tech heads. sIL is the sorority girl type so very good at building social capital and socializing with anyone she meets, so is my brother. Every move he finds a band to drum in, runs marathons, coaches baseball, drums/tympani in church band, hosts neighborhood pool parties, etc. We see them for thanksgiving, usually at the beach or Disney since the kids are all u der age 7 still. They put our social life and network of sitters to shame. Main point: takes effort to build and rebuild a social network, grandparents fly in for bits of long travel sessions, get 2-4 babysitters at the ready. [/quote]
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