Reply to What to do when there is no "village"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It gets worse after the little kid years.  Just wait until sports and homework start in mid-elementary.  I was in your shoes, and we decided it would be best for my DH to become a SAHD.[/quote]

Ugh, I’m so tired of people making this claim. Having been in both boats, yes, having elementary school aged kids is still time consuming/expensive but it is not the same as a toddler that you can barely leave alone to use the bathroom and spending 2,500/month on full time daycare.[/quote]

NP: while I totally totally agree older kids are easier (by FAR) I will say the after school hours can be extremely crazy- depending on what activities the kids do and the general family schedule. For us it is much easier OTHER than the hours between 3pm- 8pm of so on weekdays. I went part time because I could not hack it. However- a good nanny (who drives!!) could do it. Different ages, different issues...[/quote]

ETA: but I have three kids- who are not crazy overscheduled (generally one activity each, at a time) but with three...Some afternoons/evenings are unbelievably  crazy. If I had fewer kids and/or good  backup i(nanny, DH who is home reliably early, involved grandparent) etc it would be easy.[/quote]

I'm the OP with the SAHD who said it gets worse.  Sorry, I should have been clearer! I was strictly speaking in terms of scheduling, which is a lot of the reason people bemoan not having a "village".  Unless you get a nanny or an au pair, I'm telling you, your schedule will get tougher to manage.  Parenting is definitely easier in may ways, but the after school, 3-8pm window can be wild.  When our kids were in daycare, we were each able to work inflexible jobs.  Daycare was open every day except for holidays.  Our schedule was the same every day.  Once elementary school hits, there is a lot more variability.  FCPS regularly will take over a dozen snow days in January/February, and that doesn't even count all the delayed openings.  The school is also closed for many teacher work days, and there are ample amounts of time the schools are closed for holidays (for example, two full weeks at Christmas).  You'll also be patching together a million camps during the summer.  Older children also have a better concept of time, and when they come home in the evening they'll need someone to talk to, especially if they're processing some sort of difficult social interaction.

So, yeah, it gets easier, but your desire for a village won't go away.  The only people I know who seem to handle it with ease have a SAHP or a FT nanny / au pair.[/quote]

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