Reply to Excessively dependent mother still completely helpless months after dad's death

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
She's very lucky to be there, and very stupid to not have considered this scenario all the years of her long life.

I would not move her. I would attempt to reassure her, be positive, comfort her, and teach her these things. And if she can't, well, her trash will accumulate, she won't watch TV, and none of those things will kill her.
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The reason I say this is that I saw my mother and her sisters deal with this for their mother. My grandmother was served hand and foot her whole life (maids, chauffeur, cook, gardener, etc) and when my Grandfather died, and she eventually squandered all her money and had to downsize to a small apartment in her old age without help, she didn't know what anything was in the kitchen, and she was incredibly sad and offended that she could not continue her previous lavish lifestyle. My family pooled resources for someone to come in every day to cook meals, clean and help her wash and get dressed. My grandmother learned to use the remote and unfold her own newspaper!!! Everything else was done for her until she died, and we managed to afford it.

My point is that I am sure your own mother can adjust the tiny little bit that she needs, despite her protestations that she is just too much of a genteel lady to ever be able to :-)
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