Reply to 6th grader is only kid in his peer group without a phone

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Please get your kid a phone! Or other digital device that allows texting. They need to learn how to use it properly -- keeping phones away doesn't teach that. This is the world, it's so strange to me that people want their kids to learn 20th century communication skills but neglect 21st century training. Why should they be able to write essays at 11 but not text? This is basic social functioning in the world today.

And impose rules and structure and teach digital hygiene and all the rest, but please do not monitor everything. Have better things to do. Stop spying on your kid. Spot check, sure, but give them some privacy and focus on building trust and having actual conversations with your kid instead of "monitoring" them. Otherwise they will very quickly learn to evade - focus on teaching good judgment instead. Ask questions. Hard ones. But for the love of god stop reading every single text they send and receive, it's exhausting just hearing about it.

My kid has had a phone since mid-elementary school and rolls her eyes every time a friend gets a new phone because they send a million emojis and chain-mail -style texts and generally have no idea how to communicate properly. It usually takes a few months for kids to get the hang of it.

My other kid has also had a phone since the 5th grade. He's now in 11th and says the kids who are obsessively instagramming and always have their phones out and don't know how to have face-to-face conversations are inevitably the kids who are new to smartphones. They haven't developed their social skills co-extensively with their tech skills and they are the ones that make all the mistakes.

Also, I am so over having to contact parents to make plans. These are middle schoolers. They should be able to socialize more or less independently. If your kid cannot communicate independently, they will probably not hang out with my kid, because she is not going to call you to hang out, and neither am I, sorry!

ps for the love of god stop calling it a "playdate." It's infantilizing.

[/quote]

Children in elementary school do not need phones.  Period.  They don't need to be learning how to text.

Kids will eventually need to learn to use phones and social media responsibly.  Elementary school is not that time.  Parents like you are a NIGHTMARE.[/quote]

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