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[quote=Anonymous]I feel you, OP. I had too much solo time with my kids in the past week and was just beyond fed up with them yesterday (almost 5 and 8.) I'll throw this out there in case it helps: I made my younger one a behavior chart (we've done this for him at school) and am considering doing it for my daughter as well. Feeling mad for grousing about the same behaviors over and over without any change occurring, I was really specific about the things I want him to work on ("when someone asks you to do something, listen, do it right away, and don't complain.") He can get 0, 1, or 2 stars in each category for the day, and the right total # equals gum that night (he loves gum.) Already today, I got to applaud him for doing well at the one I mentioned above while having him write a 0 for kicking his sister during a game. I think he is invested in his progress and becoming more aware of his behavior.

Am I happy that it's because of the gum bribe? No; part of the problem is that he only sees the consequences for things when he loses a privilege. Am I looking forward to asking him to put his pajamas on and NOT running facedown onto his bed? That would be a yes. Your 8-year-old could even create some of the categories for herself (3-5 is plenty) and name rewards or consequences. No need for it to be complex--we've done gum; we've said that 3 weeks of 6 or more stars equals a small Lego toy.

I am sure people will rush in and declare this Draconian, so fine. But I find it helpful to identify for myself what's driving me bananas and to make it specific for the kid so we can all contribute to the progress.

Whatever you do, good luck!! You are really not alone. [/quote]

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