Reply to What do you do when none of the men you met want a "serious relationship"?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][b]Is she asking your advice?  Doesn't seem like it.[/b]

If she wants a serious relationship she'll find guys who do.  There are plenty out there, especially at her age.  In all honesty I am much more concerned about my relatives who "met the one" in their teens (a cousin is getting married this week in the summer before her senior year at college to the only boyfriend she's ever had) than someone who dates casually through their twenties.

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My advice? No because I obviously have none. But she was definitely venting that she'll meet a great guy who has a lot going for him and who wants to hang out in a way that I would have qualified as boyfriend/girlfriend. But he doesn't want to be "exclusive" (even if they are spending all their time together so they are exclusive - he just doesn't want to close out the possibility of meeting someone even better) and he doesn't want to mislead her that it might lead to marriage because he won't be ready to settle down for years yet.

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To add to this, she says it's frustrating because this is all the great men she and her friends meet. Her friends will try to make something of this type of arrangement ("cool girl" syndrome she called it) and it almost never works.

What I'm saying is, it must be soooo frustrating because it's like the men have all the power in this scenario because they are withholding. [/quote]

Well, duh, playing the “cool girl” never works. It shows you have no self esteem and will settle for scraps. Of course no man wants to commit to that, and no man is attracted to desperation.

[b]It’s pretty disturbing that you use the term “withholding”. Nobody is entitled to something that another person doesn’t want to give.[/b] It’s no different than single guys complaining that women “withhold” sex. [/quote]

Because these guys are more than happy to act the part of a boyfriend (hanging out every night, meeting the friends, practically living together on weekends, etc.) and not use the term and not be willing to give up the possibility of other women. That's withholding! [/quote]

Oh please. Like the woman in that relationship wouldn't ditch him if a better guy came along. [i]Even if she said she was "committed" and "acted the part of a girlfriend".[/i]

He's not doing anything that pretty much every woman doesn't do.[/quote]

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