Reply to If 1st yr grades were subpar, unreasonable to demand DC live on campus 2nd yr?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Rather than fight about where to live when she is AWAY at college, have you tried saying that if her grades do not improve, she will have to move back home (assuming she cannot support herself independently)?

That may do the trick.

But I do agree, you need to get some sense from her about what is wrong (does she feel incapable of the work? is it time management? too much partying? unmotivated/immature?)

Good luck. I am sure this is stressful and disappointing.[/quote]

This sounds like the right strategy to me.  In our family we make it pretty clear that our children have the right to go to whichever college they prefer and that accepts them but that they have a responsibility to the family to do well while they are there.  We talk about what 'doing well' looks like and means because it has looked like different things for different kids.

OP, I don't see that you mentioned it but what transpired when you received the first semester or first trimester grades?  Were they adequate so that there was no conversation or were they low but there still wasn't a conversation or did you all talk and you thought the grades were coming up?

For the specific question though unless OP's daughter specifically states that the dorm situation is so bad that it contributed negatively to the grades then I would be hesitant to see living off-campus as an alternative that would have merit.  Does she need a break this year?  Maybe a year at home doing community college and working?  Or does she have a plan on how to change her path so that next year's outcomes are substantially improved over this year's?[/quote]

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