Reply to s/o Why so much delusion by parents of adult kids around "big happy family get togethers"

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Reply to "s/o Why so much delusion by parents of adult kids around "big happy family get togethers""

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Are you suggesting that mom/grandma invited only one of her kids and her/his family for Thanksgiving? Can you imagine the drama this would create? Even if uninvited adult child really didn't want to go?[/quote]

What drama? 
See adult kid #1+their family at Thanksgiving
See adult kid #2+their family at Christmas
Alternate the holidays every year.
See? Easy. Even do-able with more siblings, just pick different holidays, or maybe don’t get fixated on having to be together on a holiday.

Again, I’m not saying this is the way it must be done, but if it’s been clearly demonstrated that having everyone at the same time is not working, then it’s better for everyone, yes EVERYONE to break things up into smaller groups.
[/quote]
I think you are assuming that people who don't get along will suddenly be reasonable and accept such a "reasonable" scenario? If they were that reasonable, why would any gathering be a cause for fights? Plus, you are putting a lot on parents/grandparents, pitting them against their own kids. These same kids and ILS that hate each other. "How come Larla gets Christmas, she and her kids get the presents, and we get the turkey. Why does mom hate me?"[/quote]

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