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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I’m 44, never married and no kids. I think I’m a lot happier than most of my friends because I don’t have relationship, kid or financial stress. I only have to worry about myself. I travel internationally 10x a year. Lately I’ve been asking myself if I’d regret my choices not to have a family when I’m 60, but for the moment [b](and the present moment is what matters)[/b] I am happy. I don’t need to find my purpose through a spouse or children. [/quote]

This is a really interesting perspective. I always wanted to be married, and I wasted a lot of my 'single carefree' years worrying about no being married. I LOVE being married, but only recently decided to have a child (just one). But I never would have had a child if I expected to be happy in the present moment all the time.

Children are a garden. It takes years of tilling, sowing, sprouting, watering, shielding and all sorts of physical and emotional toil to grow a beautiful garden. A family is something you build to enjoy many years down the road. If I look at the day-to-day moments over the past three years it's a tapestry of the highest highs and the lowest lows, but when I think of walking through my life with my husband and the sweet little soul we're nurturing, then I couldn't be happier or more excited for the future. I guess to me (for the moment), the future is what matters. [/quote]

Don’t you need a decent level of happiness in the present moment? What if one of you dies, gets incredibly sick, your kid gets addicted to drugs, there is some type of major falling out? The future isn’t a guarantee.[/quote]

Oh there are definitely very happy moments in between the tough times, and I'm happy generally (but much happier now that DD is 3-years-old and is sweet, hilarious and more independent then ever. But first couple of years (for me) were very, very hard. If I was only focused on being happy in the present, then I probably wouldn't have taken the leap into what were the toughest two years of my life. [/quote]

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