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[quote=Anonymous]OP, I am very sorry.  My mother was like this after my second child was born, and her behavior really caused a riff between us and we were quasi estranged for about a year.  It was awful.  We moved when I was 8 months pregnant and she volunteered out of nowhere to help us on the moving day with my toddler, so I said ok.  But then she demanded to be put up in a fancy hotel because she didn't want to sleep with boxes everywhere, and we also said ok and did it, and paid for it.  Then on moving day she said she didn't want to watch my toddler because she was too hyper, and said she would help with the movers, but only sitting down because she claimed to have vertigo.  It was a circus.  When we told her (politely) it was fine, she could just go home, she blew a fuse.

When I had DC2, my MIL had asked to help with the toddler and we said ok and my mother got so upset.  She refused to visit me in the hospital where I was for over a week.  She refused to see her new grandchild for a month.  And she then declared she would never spend the night in our new house because the guest suite was in the basement and she doesn't sleep in basements, even though she had been there when we first saw the house and wanted to buy it and she said she loved the guest suite and couldn't wait to visit.

Fast forward 5 years things have gotten a lot better, but only when I put up some serious boundaries and did therapy.  It is very hard for me to see other friends with extremely kind and involved grandparents but thems the breaks for me.  And my kind MIL died suddenly, so now my parents are all my kids have as far as grandparents go so I try as best as I can to maintain a relationship that isn't toxic for me.  Good Luck OP[/quote]

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