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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
Little children need stability, competence and love. 
It’s worth the sacrifice to give your own children what they *need*.

[/quote]

Little children can also get stability, competence, and love from a quality daycare provider or nanny.  That can't be the only reason a parent decides to SAH.

-- signed, a SAHM[/quote]
Perhaps they “can”, but we all know the reality....
Let’s be honest here.

Providing your children what they need - is a major reason why many families make the sacrifice to live on one income.[/quote]

I would have said this before having kids.  I grew up with a SAHM who was very against women working when they have kids. She made it very clear that women who work are choosing money over giving their kids love and that staying home is always better.

Now that I’ve had children and have experienced watching nannies with kids, sending a kid to daycare, raising my own kids, etc, I’m not convinced that one way is better than the other.  There are bad nannies and there are bad moms.  There are pros and cons to each arrangement.  If you stay home it should be for you.  Unfortunately, you may be in for a disappointment later if you really think staying home was some tremendous benefit to your child.  I mean go and watch kids at a decent daycare (if you were allowed to do so).  You’d be shocked how happy they look.  They don’t look any happier or unhappeir than kids at the playground with SAHMs.  [/quote]

NP with a very difficult baby who is now a difficult baby-toddler. I SAH. There have been a number of days over the past 17 months DH has come home and I have said if this child was watched by anyone other than me, his mother, he would have been left in a corner to cry while the caretaker checked out completely because he was just SO difficult. ALL DAY LONG. I used to work, there were days I used to phone it in. I can see how an easy-ish baby might fare the same in any childcare situation, but my child would definitely have gotten some phoned-in care very regularly if he was with a nanny or daycare. On those days I would remind myself that I am his mother, I can't phone it in, and I would regroup and find the energy to try to deal with whatever firestorm was currently happening. I can't imagine someone just doing a job would be able to do the same.[/quote]

On the flip side of this, some parents who love their kids to the moon and back (aka me) would also be phoning it in with those kids and plopping them in front of a video or checking out.  At least at childcare, there are multiple caregivers who can back each other up and give each other a break.  I have worked part time and full time at various times through my kids' lives and know that I am not cut out for staying home full time.  I've been lucky enough to find part-time work that pays enough that I can spend more time with my kids than I did when I was full time, but I'm pretty darn sure that I would not have happier kids if they were home with me all day and I am 100% sure that I wouldn't be happier.  [/quote]

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